Pisces man is making me mad and angry
I am new here and I want to share my story (sorry for my bad English at times, it's not my first language).
We're both pisces (I have ascendent in scorpio).
He texted every few days, sometimes more often and other times nothing for like 3 - 4 days. He suggested we should meet again, I said fine and then he canceled AGAIN! Since then it happened three times all together that he said we should meet and then he cancelled. And the next time we spoke he didn't seem bothered at all by the fact he had to cancel, he just wanted to set another date and he was all nice and sweet again.
So yesterday evening he called and said that we can meet for a drink in about an hour because he had a lot of work but finally has the time now. He said he'll call when he's near my house. I was so happy he called, I got ready, put my make up on and then I waited....and waited....and waited!!!! The first two hours I felt he is just running late or something, but I sat on my bed and waited for 4 hours straight! I just couldn't believe I am such an idiot for believing him. I called and he didn't answer, I sent a text and nothing......it's 24 hours after now and he didn't even call or text or anything.
I don't even know if something happened to him or if he's still alive or what, but I guess this is just him dissapearing. I really don't know what to do if he calls, I don't know if I could take one more time of him letting me down. I just want to see him, even if for just 5 minutes, because I can't (and don't want to) cling on memories of how he used to be.
I really don't know why he even bothers to keep contact and why he makes plans if he never shows up. I don't want to text him now, because I called yesterday and he didn't answer the phone and I sent two texts and he didn't text back.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Pas de Deux on -
That alone means he will never be a wonderful bf...real men don't disappear. Sure, EVERYONE needs alone time but they take it to the extreme and they do it selfishly. Wow-just noticed this...the END of the word SELFISH is FISH. Coincidence???
Anyway, that one thing alone takes him out of the running in my book. And how old is he? He's never had a long term relationship? Red flag.....
I just wish I could take my own advice with Pisces!!!!
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Permalink Reply by belladonna on -
And how old is he? He's never had a long term relationship? Red flag.....
Agreed. He will only break your heart.
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Permalink Reply by ADL on -
Everyone can be selfish in their own ways.. And just because hes selfish with her it does not mean hes selfish with other people in his life. We cant assume that.
Him having a long term relationship or not does not mean "red flag."
My bud is 25 and never had a long term relationship, and hes not a dog either. Hes a great guy just hasent found someone he wants to commit to. Does that make him selfish or should it raise a red flag? No....
Just because a girl likes me and is persuing me it does not mean i should give her a chance or even go with the flow. I go with the flow if i want it to happen. In her eyes she may think im selfish and perhaps even running away from her. But thats my choice.
I would not do that to someone i really wanted to be with.
Do you see what im getting at?
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Permalink Reply by Pas de Deux on
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I absolutely see what you are getting at....but to me it sounds as if he started the relationship, he told her he wanted to get toknow her better, he set up the first meeting and blew it and each consecutive one off......it doesn't sound like she pursued him, quite the opposite......and that's what makes it even more confusing for the poor girl.
Would you say that to a girl you didn't really want to be with???? I doubt it so why then?
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Permalink Reply by Dontcare on -
Yes, I would get it too if he was avoiding or ignoring me, I'm not the type of person that just keeps bugging someone if I see he's not interested, but based on all his words, his intentions were totally different then now. And I mean...why even bother to write first to someone if you're not interested? I really believed he just hasn't had the time. If he said "Look, this is a really busy period of my life, I could see you more in March (or whenever) and I would be happy if you are willing to wait." - I would said ok, fine, I would understand.
I just wish he told me all of this sooner and I wouldn't get my hopes too high.
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Permalink Reply by Pas de Deux on
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Well to me it sounds pretty damn Pisces-like. Yes, there are Pisces out there who are capable of being honest, straightforward and upfront, my best friend is a pisces and she is all of those things...it just seems to me that more often than not the males all act like yours....i have one who does it and there seems to be more posts here and on sass.com about pisces men doing this. Of course it's a small sample considering there are millions & millions of pisces out there but you just don't see posts from women complaining nearly as much about any other sign as you do about pisces men.....so i am just basing my opinion on personal experience and the facts as I have seen them laid out on this forum.
ADL-please don't take my opinion of this Pisces story personally as I have found you to be more direct about what you want than many pisces guys and have always valued your opinion.
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Permalink Reply by Russ H on -
I could try to help, I'm actually a triple pisces or close to it (Rising,Sun,Mercury,Venus in Pisces). I guess its true about Pisces being the push and pull and you guys are both pisces..unfortunately it needs saying that most pisces males need to be approached that we don't like to do the approaching. We (the males at least) also have enough on our plate emotionally that its hard to deal with women's problems, especially when younger. Sounds like he just hasn't matured enough for you. Escaping for awhile is common but he shouldn't have stood you up if he had any interest. You want to get his attention? QUIT TALKING TO HIM! I almost guarantee he will be obsessed with you after that lol
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Permalink Reply by Dontcare on
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I have a filling that when he's done, he's done (based on his words), but it's true that I really don't know him so well and that he could be just trying to slip away before it could actually become serious.
What I'll do is that I'll stop writing to him and the only thing I'll do is that I'll send him a text for his birthday (mid March), but nothing special, I won't write "are you up for a drink" or something like that, just a simple happy birthday, to see if he'll answer. In the meantime, I'll live my life and try to have fun without him on my mind. If he contacts me before, that's fine, but I really won't do the chasing, because I would have a feeling like I'm bugging him, 'cause I really don't know what he wants at this time of his life.
Maybe we just had a bad timing and we need a break, I know he has a lot of going on in his life right now and he probably just doesn't want to get involved with someone if he knows he'll never have the time for this person. Or I don't know.
We'll see.
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Permalink Reply by Jadey on -
This is just utterly disrespectful. I would not tolerate this from any sign.
To have to cancel once or twice over a period of time is fine, but when it's done in such a completley thoughtless way ie:not letting you know he is running late/ wont be showing up, and showing no remorse for letting you down it is completley unacceptable.
If he is behaving this way now then things will only get worse. Walk away with some dignity now, please don't let him keep doing this to you.
I recently got out of a relationship with a Pisces man, during our relationship he seemed like a great guy and never let me down, he was often late but he acknowledged it and was apologetic. I doubt anything would make we want to date another Pisces after my experience with him, towards the end he was cheating, yet went to great lengths to let me believe I was just paranoid. All the while stalking and manipulating me. I finally put an end to it by finding evidence and the moment I did I was so disgusted by him, my feelings died then and there. He still contacts me from time to time but he simply irritates me now.
Yes Pisces men are known for being flakey and unreliable, but what he is doing is just plain bad manners.
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Permalink Reply by Christopher on -
Hi Jadey,
While I agree with you and sympathize with you, there is also the fact that this poor Pisces girl is trying to make something with another Pisces.
Pisces-Pisces is waaaaaaaaaaaaay too emotionally draining.
Pisces-Cancer will work out, but I also take into account Decan and other planetary alignments when these two match up.
I truly am sorry about that disaster you recently went through, and I am praying for you as you mend your broken heart.
Chris
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Permalink Reply by Sexy_Promethean on -
What about Pisces and Scorpio? Would you ever give that a shot?
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Permalink Reply by bijou on -
Hmmm. I think you are missing something by trying to make his behavior fit into your known forms of experience. Flaking on you does not mean that he is not interested in you. It goes deeper than that, and I think that you probably sense that he IS interested in you, which is why you are thinking that maybe you'll send him a birthday greeting, etc. The thing is....it's not about you.
He can have a relationship with you, without having you - because he can live it in his head. But that doesn't make up for him not taking the time to really know YOU. Perhaps he senses that he will get lost in you, meaning that by actually relating to you, or committing to you - it becomes about YOU and no longer about him. If he is not in a place where he can lose himself, then he simply won't. He'll stay away. He'll be drawn to you and seek you out because he is interested, but then he'll disappear because he's not secure.
There's nothing you can do to make him feel secure. He's got to be secure on his own. He's most likely dreaming of you, and thinking of you - but what does he really KNOW of you? Nothing. So, he's feeding off of your energy to fuel his idea of you.
The more energy you give him, the more he will stick around - but if he's not willing to get to know YOU, then he's not ever going to be there for you. Relationships are a two way street and that's why he doesn't want one at this time. It's not about you - it's about him not wanting to go any way except his own way.
If you are willing to go in his direction, there's no doubt he'll let you tag along for the ride. But you won't get anything except a ride down HIS road, going wherever he wants to take you until you are lost and reliant on him...and you will leave your own further and further behind.
The sad thing is that the real you is 1,000 times better and more exciting than his illusion you. It is his loss, and he feels that too. But it still won't make him change. Only he can change himself.
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